In the beginning I decided to breastfeed moment by moment, and not think about the next moment. It was so incredibly painful. I have long since forgotten the pain of delivering Peter, but I still poingnantly remember the excrutiating pain that I experienced in the first three weeks of breastfeeding. Thanks be to God for women that make a career of teaching others the art of breastfeeding. I love Ellen my lactation consultant.
It's over a year later. I made it....I was hoping to last an entire year. After the first three months is became much easier, but it wasn't until about month six that I really began to realize all the wonderful benefits of nursing. My very active boy did not like to be cuddled but this allowed us that special time. It is very convenient to say the least, especially during those 5 am breakfast calls from his crib. I could get out of bed and practically sleep walk into his room and feed him and hardly remember the interlude in the morning when I finally got up for good at 7 am.
I was prepared and enthusiastic at 11 months that the time was approaching that I would begin to wean Peter. A year came and went and at 13 months I gave him his sippy cup during the day filled with Organic Whole Milk. There was no trauma and incredibly the trasition during the day was flawless.
Now, I am not sure if I am going to wean the early morning, and bedtime nursing. It is literally the only time that this wonderful, energetic, independant boy sits calmly in my lap. We have quiet time where his eyes are half closed, we have playful time when he "honks" my nose and smiles, we have talking time where he intently listens to me, and we have times when he's barely awake. When I give this up, these times will be lost to me except in my memories. Yes, I know that he still lets me rock him to sleep , and that he lets me read him a book but it's not quite the same. Funny thing is that I laughed when I heard other women explain this trasition as being very sad.
I hear myself thinking I want my body back, but then I realize that there will be many things that I will be sacraficing in order to reclaim this independence.
One thing is sure, being a mother has made me a sappy, cry at a Hallmark comercial women.
1 comment:
It is a bittersweet transition. However, I will say that Sage, never really being the cuddly type her entire infant life, cuddles all the time now ... so while you might be giving up the immediate snuggles, most likely there will be many sweet moments to cherish in the future. Our favorite lately -- milk in bed until 7 a.m.! "We're having family time," says Sage : ) But, all that said, wean or don't wean at your own discretion. He might even wean himself which would make the choice a bit easier. I totally forgot to tell you that the other day -- Sage weaned herself. One day I went to nurse her in the morning, all snuggled up in bed, and she pointed toward the kitchen (aka -- bottle!). And that was it for us.
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